Four Friends, One Fortune:


It was a Saturday, ten o’clock in the morning, and as casual, I was walking to the other side of the street to get some bread. It was a tradition to have a nice breakfast alone and after finishing it, meet my friends by the door. I loved to cover my breakfast with tons of butter and heat it up in the toasting machine… To tell the truth, there is nothing better than some hot and fresh toasts in the morning.
Jack and John, or simply Jay to the Jay, were like brothers to me. I felt as if they were every single moment of my life with me, accompanying each step that I made.  They were twins and were born the same day my mother gave me life, at the same unit of time… same minutes…same seconds... Colin used to tell me that that was a pretty weird coincidence, but I believed in destiny and that people should meet others at the right time, following the perfect scriptures of life. They helped me when I felt bad, and they could understand me perfectly.
Colin was a brown haired, robust student who liked to harass weak kids. During break times, he liked to rob the money little kids had been given to afford their lunches. He treated stronger people in the same vulgar way as he treated tiny beings, but to be sincere, he never tried to touch one single atom of my body or drive me one single disrespecting word… He felt identified with me, I don’t know why, and valued me like a soldier valued his captain. The same happened to Jack and John, whom Colin never tried to disrupt either physically or psychologically. Maybe because he knew about the importance they had to me… Hurting them was like hurting me.
We had never invited the rude mister to our “private” morning conversations, but he was always present… a bothering presence in a calm atmosphere of understanding and identification. But to tell the whole truth, he used to open himself to us, as if we were his own shrink, and the same we did to him… He would never hurt us.
Jack and John were brown haired, middle-sized boys. They usually wore wooden glasses, but avoided them just like I did, in the presence of others, for we felt utterly confident and comfortable near each other, but completely rejected in the world of “normal” people. I remembered when they told me that every time they headed to the baker’s shop. They could describe the eyes following them, everywhere, as if they were sub-humans in a world of supreme human commandment.
- When I headed to the salesman in the register box, all eyes followed me… I tried to ignore them, but I just couldn’t… I felt terrible… - said Jack, with a few tears in his eyes – I headed to the last step with the breads in my hands, dreaming about my toasts, and I heard the creepy voice of the salesman… His voice sounded so stupidly strange, like a waccho… a complete moron!
With the same tears in his eyes, the other Jay affirmed:
- Complete morons! I can’t understand why they observe us… What have we done? Are we that different!?
I felt moved by those affirmations and I expressed grief, like an emotional bitch, but they were like me and I wasn’t ashamed of crying too… Actually, I would cry much more if my body allowed me, but we generally tried to change subjects with funny conversation topics. Colin told us about the tiny kid he trapped inside the school’s toilet, and the sorrowful, pallid appearance he had when he was finally rescued. It was quite shocking for the boy and me and Jack and John didn’t approve his attitude. But I have to admit that we laughed together… A fourteen year old boy can’t call for his mommy! What is he, a geeky mommy’s son?
I watched the brilliant glaze in my friends’ eyes, Robert never approved Colin’s attitude, and my brother, John, couldn’t resist laughing about such pathetical things. I laughed too, but I am a good actor… I’m quite bad from the inside, like Colin. But there is a big difference that makes my personality quite dissimilar from that of Colin… I like to judge people, but I’m not courageous enough to tell them in the face… When I act like me, I’m just a little kid calling for his mother… Actually, just like the guy trapped in the toilet… Like a soul in a vortex of bewilderment.
It was my time to tell a story now… I didn’t want to hurt the sentimental side of Robert, but it was necessary… I told them about my family problems, and about not being trusted by them. I was accused all the time, for my personality always generated an upheaval in my home’s atmosphere. My dad cursed me, and said that I would never have real friends if I couldn’t control my depressing inside, but I knew that as long as I was alive, I would always have my brother, Robert, and sadly, Colin. I liked him, but I felt ashamed of thinking like him… I really wished I could analyze situations like Robert.
My mother tried to understand me, but she couldn’t call me by my real name… She always called me Robert or Colin, and confused me with my brother… But for this last fact I cannot blame her: My brother and I are too similar… I didn’t understand why she mixed my name with those of my friends, when I had never presented them to her…
It was during these times that I felt angry and nervous. I wanted to hit her, just like I did with the fifteen years old geeky when I inserted him in that smelly bathroom. She was such a stupid mother and it was unfair to be called like that. In that sense I really prefer my father, and I don’t want to hurt him. He never confused my name, even though I never heard his voice calling Colin… Maybe, he simply doesn’t know my name, but I agree that it is much better to have the name forgotten, in the world of oblivion, than being called by the name of your friends, as if they were much better than we are.
I told Robert and the double Jay that I wanted to stab her every single moment she called me by their names… Why do they confuse us? We are all brown haired and tough, but I have to admit that people who know us well, will always know who the hell we are…
- Come on dude, I understand how you feel, but you shouldn’t allow your emotions to conquer you… Many times we allow our souls to be hypnotized by fear and puzzlement, but we are always going to be ourselves. – Affirmed Robert prudently – Hitting people will never solve the problem, just comprehension and wisdom
Robert was quite the Mahatma Gandhi, and his speeches always supported our mental recovery. He was the wise guy in the universe of stupid creatures… He was the only of us who could think properly, and was not taken away by his personality. Colin tried to manipulate his thoughts most of the times, but his ideas were uncorrupted, and his intelligence, virtuous. The other day I was discussing with Jack about Colin’s attempts to mesmerize Robert, and we couldn’t think of anything to help him out. We knew that Colin didn’t do this on purpose, and we didn’t blame him, but every attempt he made caused Robert to be even farther from us, just as if his knowledge was being destroyed. Robert was our emotional core, and the only one in control of the situation.
I don’t like the way the twins talk to me… Robert is stupid! I am, and I will always be the king of our morning conversations. Whenever I feel like, I can just kick Robert’s ass and be the supreme lord. I just don’t hurt him because I can’t… Every time I approach him, I feel as if he was out of range… But I won’t go for Robert right now… The twins are the ones bothering me, and I cannot hurt the wrong person… Violence solves nothing! I hate the attitude of Colin towards other people… I know he doesn’t sympathize with the twins as much as he does with me… We are opposites, and opposites will always be attracted, right? So I can’t blame him If he feels far away from me when the twins are present.
We are not afraid of Colin. He can be this monster sometimes, but he is so dumb… He might shout at us from time to time, but nothing more. We know that the poor guy needs attention… In our school, nobody likes him. He is excluded from the groups, from the classes and when he goes for violence, all alumni gets together to fight him. It is funny yet sad to see that… An army of students against one single guy… We hate when they insert us in their fight, but I suppose these are the consequences of being Colin friends, right? Suffering, and getting gashed with him…
Robert told us that it was temporary, that Colin would calm down when he learnt to control himself… But he was wrong. Every single day that passed, marked the strengthening of Colin’s aggressions. After one month, he started to insult us, and Robert, who was supposed to be there to help us, was distant. We were getting close from dismissing our morning meetings, due to the harassments generated by Colin, but we just couldn’t… Routine was stronger than the will to stop. But our morning meetings lost all the funny topics we used to have… Colin had become the supreme lord, and most of Robert’s comments had been silenced.
We decided to talk to him, and force him to go away… We couldn’t have our peaceful meetings, and we would be in silence if he couldn’t stop…
Those freaks think that I’ll let Robert speak. Insolents! Haven’t they realized how much I love to control the most peaceful person I know!? It is as if I could read Robert’s thoughts, and they could read mine, but I am stronger… They wouldn’t be able to kick me. This was when I decided to make the most important step of all… With Robert silenced, they would certainly be afraid of me, giving me all the right to speak.
We saw him coming with that broken bottle… but we wouldn’t be able to defend Robert… Even though we tried, Colin’s thoughts prevailed… I held the broken fragment of the bottles in my hand, and approached it to Robert’s chest. He was going to be silenced forever… I felt the stab, and fell on my knees… Colin, Jack and John had been neutralized, it was all over, I had finally reigned…